Blogging + Ranking Things in Lists = Awesomness.
The Fifth Edition of the Blogger MVP/ROY Rankings is being hosted by Truth About It dot net. They are solid, check them out.. You should know the drill with the rankings and all the business by now, so quit wasting your time with my needless chatter and check them out! Unfortunately, I think the editors of this edition hate me, since they only listed one of my amazingly awesome, hilarious, and witty comments. Slightly discouraging. At least if you read the rest of this post you can see all my geniusness. If you want to check out how I voted and my super witty and extremely humorous stupid un-funny comments, just scroll down a little ways. Feel free to mock and ridicule my voting as you see fit.
After careful consideration, I wasn’t going to inundate you with my boring rankings and comments decided to post my rankings and comments for my 10 MVP’s and 5 Rookies of the Year below:
(10 = 1, 9 = 2, 8 = 3 and so on)
10. Jeff Foster: Broke Carmelo Anthony’s hand. A job very well done.
9. Brandon Roy: Drops due to the fact that he has missed a few games lately due to injury. Maybe I don’t look so dumb for trading him from my Western Conference Only Auction Keeper Fantasy Basketball Team after all. No wait, that was still really stupid of me.
8. 5 way tie: KG/PP/Ray/Rondo/Perkins: None of them are playing good enough right now to deserve the award on their own. Therefore, they all get 20% of one vote since the Celtics deserve to be mentioned in some capacity.
7. Kobe Bryant: To reward his excellent play and team’s stellar record, I (begrudgingly) moved him up one spot for this edition.
6. Tim Duncan: I opened him up and saw that his Energizer Battery isn’t set to expire until the year 2015.
5. Dirk: He’d totally suck if he wasn’t 7 feet tall and German.
4. Dwight Howard: He “only” had 8 rebounds on Jan 4th because he was too busy scoring 39 points. He’s averaging something like 42 rebounds per game. Absurd.
3. Chris Paul: A shooting guard trapped inside a point guard’s body. Granted, it’s the body of one of the best point guards of our generation. Not bad consolation.
2. D-Wade: So I was at Perkins the other day eating some waffles, and who comes in but D-Wade himself. I am shocked. So, I say to him: “Yo Flash you are da gravy train baby, hot diggity you be unstoppable bro. Keep bringin’ da pain like rain turn yo opponents insane. MiamiHeat4NBAChamps09 playa.” He ignores me and orders 63 eggs. It was his pre-breakfast snack.
1. LeBron James: Yawn.
(5 = 1, 4 = 2 and so on)
5. DJ Augustine: Back to being good again.
4. Brook Lopez: Leading the rookies in rebounding, which blows my mind. Kid can also score too… as he’s averaging over 10 ppg.
3. Russell Westbrook: Dude is awesome. The third best guard of the draft class, and I ain’t playin. If you haven’t seen him in action (and odds are that you haven’t because the Thunder blow), you owe it to yourself to watch him ball. He is legit.
2. Derrick Rose: Rose-Mayo, Mayo-Rose, Mayo-Westbrook-Rose, Rose-Mayo, Rose-Westbrook-Mayo, Mayo-Rose… ahhh crap, I’m rolling with this.
1. OJ Mayo: I am glad the Twolves didn’t keep him, because I just don’t see how he could have fit into our team this year. [/sarcasm]