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Finally… The Top Ten Worst T-Wolves of All-Time!

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After what I assume to be tepid anticipation, we finally present to you the Top Ten Worst Timberwolves of All-Time!  If you missed it, this all stemmed from a TWB reader comment in my personal results for the Top Ten (Best) Minnesota Timberwolves of All-Time, posted two weeks ago.  The reason I made that post was to participate in Jeff Fox’s (of Hoops Manifesto) results for the Top Ten players of every NBA team.  Here are his results for your very own T-Wolves.  (Click at your own risk, it’s rather disgusting.)

Annnnnnyways, we decided to also go another direction with this, and highlight the very worst that this organization has had to offer over the years.  I conducted an open vote for any readers/members of TWolves Blog (so basically all 19 people out there reading this site.)  I will say, the quality of skill on this list isn’t much different than our top ten best players… ok, I’m kidding. (But I bet you were nodding in agreement right there.)  I guess what I’m saying is that we Wolves fans have had it pretty rough the past 20 years.  The criteria for this list was that it had to be a “regular player” of sorts, and established a cut-off of having played roughly a minimum of 1,000 career minutes for the Woofies. Without further ado…

Please click “Read More” to see the infamous results for the top ten WORST T-Wolves ever…

10) Mark Blount: 2006 – 2007

(20 Total Voting Points)

blount

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- “Played” in 82 games in 2006-07.
- Did not get arrested (that we know of.)
- By trading for him in 2006, it allowed us to get rid of the #1 player on this list.
- The above was short lived, trading him away forced Antoine Walker upon us.
- Was somehow re-acquired in 2009, but never appeared in a game.  Made $7,962,500 in salary.

 

“a.k.a. ‘The Sloth’, need I say more?!?!” – Mad_Dog04

“Nothing to say here.” – Pants

He seriously couldn’t grab 8 boards in a lumberyard.  His face perpetually looked like he had Down Syndrome.  I’m sure that wasn’t the reason he was so terrible.  – CW

 

9) Troy Hudson: 2003 – 2007

(23 Total Voting Points)

thud

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- Scored 2,576 points as a Timberwolf, the most of anyone on this list.
- Managed to score a $36 million dollar contract from Kevin McHale.  Definitely his best play ever.
- Believe it or not, had more assists than turnovers in each season he played for us.
- Recorded a rap CD that sold 87 copies its first week.
- 4th in the NBA in free throw percentage (90%) in 2002-03.

 

“At least he has a rap career he got McHale to give him an absurd contract.” - Minnesota Polars

“okay okay he did decently, yet his over sized contract n dreads killed his brain… made him hard to like in the end.” – Mad_Dog04

“Shouldn’t be any surprise. Bad contract, bad player, ever worse at rapping.” – Tom Mead

This is seriously ALL that you will EVER need to know about Troy Hudson. – CW

 

8) Ndudi Ebi: 2004 – 2005

(24 Total Voting Points)

ebi

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- Kevin McHale proclaimed him to be “the next Kevin Garnett.”
- Was so bad that he nearly caused thousands of TWolves fans (at the time… hard to believe there were once that many fans, I know) simultaneously commit suicide by shoving razors in their eyes.
- Our only first round draft pick in a 5 year span.  Thanks David Stern!
- Infinitely improved his win-shares in his second NBA season, going from 0.0 to 0.1
- Has a TWolves career 6.6 points-to-turnover ratio.  (40 career points, 6 turnovers.)
- The only player to get multiple votes on a single ballot for this study.
- Hall of Fame Probability: 0.000

 

“May not qualify with the 1000 minutes but he still belongs on the list. What a waste of our first draft pick after we finally were given a 1st round pick. Every time his name comes up it makes me want to vomit. Terrible, just terrible.” – Minnesota Polars

“Granted a 1000 minute waiver because of his dubious status as the first guy drafted in ages who couldn’t even make the NBA.” – Pants

“I didn’t follow the 1000 min thing very well here but Ebi was just awful. He was compared to Garnett and we treated him like royalty, although only playing garbage time. The 2003 draft class will probably go down as one of the greatest draft classes ever, and where was the Wolves? Drafting the forgettable Ebi and Rickert. The biggest reason I picked Ebi was his reluctance to play in the NBDL, basically saying it was beneath him.” – Tom Mead

He was sooooo god-awfully atrocious that he’s not even in the same stratosphere of pretending to approach playing 1,000 career minutes for this franchise.  And yet he still made this list.  In fact, of every player that has EVER played more than 1 game for the TWolves, Ebi has played the 16th fewest total minutes in his career (86.)  And he’s played in more career games than 27 other players.  You go figure that one out. – CW

 

7) Mark Madsen: 2004 – 2009

(25 Total Voting Points)

madsendance

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- Played in 270 games over 6 years for the TWolves, and in only one season did he have more points (259) than personal fouls (175).
- Had the same amount of turnovers as points (9) in 20 games in 2007-08.
- Probably the best cheerleader this franchise has ever employed.
- Missed 6 three-pointers the last game of the season against Memphis in 2005-06, which allowed us to “improve” our lottery pick for the upcoming draft.  Crap, it turned into Randy Foye.  Nevermind.
- Totalled negative win-shares in 2007-08 (-0.3) and 2008-09 (-0.1)
- Was included in a trade for Quentin Richardson, which allowed us to re-acquire……… player #10 on this list.

 

I don’t know how he got so many votes, I actually liked the guy in a challenged-younger-brother sort of way. – CW

 

6) Marko Jaric: 2006 – 2008

(34 Total Voting Points)

marko

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- Married Adriana Lima

 

“I hate you. 2nd worst trade behind Foye. Just give me Lima and we’ll call it good.” – Minnesota Polars

“The Human Money Sponge” – Thomas Little

“Similar to Joe Smith.  His failure was a harbinger of doom for the Garnett era ending.” – Pants

I always thought MarKo was super cool.  I guess it was just the way he exuded all that ‘Euro-Flair.”  And that’s the problem with Wolves fans, we actually like some of the worst players that ever suited up for our franchise.  Kill me now.  – CW

 

5) William Avery: 2000 – 2002

(35 Total Voting Points)

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- The lowest total amount of win shares for anyone that ever played 1,000+ minutes for the Wolves.  He totalled -0.9 win shares in 1,205 minutes over 142 games.  That’s almost impressive to be that bad and play that long.
- Shot 33% FG, 25.5% 3FG, 71.4% FT.  Remember, he was a PG drafted in the first round. 
- Played 12 minutes in the playoffs.
- Tricked organization management into funding and developing a XXX-club in the Target Center basement (may or may not be true.)
- Was not resigned after his rookie contract, thus saving the organization millions of dollars. (Glen Taylor nods approvingly.)
- Hall of Fame Probability: -0.000

 

“He has the least amount of win shares (he is actually in the negative) in Wolves history for a guy who played over 1,000 minutes.  He had a career FG% of .330 in 142 games played.  He was drafted ahead of Ron Artest, Andrei Kirilenko, James Posey, Devean George, etc.  Nobody liked him.” – BonK

You know it’s probably not a good draft choice when Coach K. (of all people) is saying this player shouldn’t have gone to the NBA.  Look at the players in the 1999 draft, and weep. – CW

 

4) Randy Foye: 2007 – 2009

(38 Total Voting Points)

randyfoye

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- 2006-07 NBA All-Rookie 1st Team
- Played 82 games in 2006-07.
- His heart is on the wrong side of his body internally, but still made our team.
- Did all kinds of charity shit.
- Included in the trade for the rights to Ricky Rubio, partly made up for the fact we gave up Brandon Roy to get him in the first place.

 

“Worst trade in franchise history. For a guard from villanova he didn’t deliver what was expected. Would be lower but hey we got Rubio from you so it was kind of worth it??” – Minnesota Polars

“Llike his partner in crime the other ‘Shoint Guard’, he never lived upto what the scouts thought and traded for Roy made it hard for twolves fans to swallow, maybe if we hadnt given up roy for him, he could have been liked better,but we did, in all he is an undersized guard who never did much if anything in Minny besta luck in la la land to ya!” – Mad_Dog04

“A Black Hole.” – Pants

“Okay, I need to keep this brief, but it’s hard for me to do that with him.  He was our “point guard of the future” even though he couldn’t pass, dribble, or defend, and was not an intelligent player.  We refused to trade him for Allen Iverson when KG was still with us.  The organization shoved him so far down our throats that I actually pooped a little bit of him out the other day.” – BonK

I can’t even talk about him without foaming at the mouth. – CW

 

3) Felton Spencer: 1991 – 1993

(46 Total Voting Points)

felton-spencer

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- 1990-91 NBA All-Rookie 2nd Team.
- Seventh in the NBA in offensive rebounds in 1990-91.
- Second in the NBA in personal fouls in 1990-91.
- Eighth in the NBA in total rebounding percentage in 1990-91.
- 8.6 total career win shares.  The most of anyone on this list!
- Traded to the Utah Jazz for Mike Brown.  Mike Brown played 2,000+ minutes in 109 games and had a Wolves career total of 1.1 win shares.  And yet Mike Brown did not make this list.
- Too lazy to confirm, but I believe he was the first seven foot tall player for this organization.  I could be wrong.  Or I could be right.  Just look at Felton in the picture above.

“#6 pick in a year with 5 serviceable NBA players.  Where I have seen that formula before.” – Pants

“The Human Turnover.” – Thomas Little

He was a little bit before my time.  Thank god I missed this atrocity. – CW

 

2) Rashad McCants: 2006 – 2009

(52 Total Voting Points)

mccantskhlo

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- Unofficial TWolves career leader in combined minutes of staticly standing beyond the three point line while our team has possession.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in thinking he’s WIDE ASS OPEN, when he was not.  He so, so, so, so was not. Ever.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in not making it back past half-court on defense before the other team scored a basket.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in complaining to officials for something he clearly did wrong.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in points scored with less than 5 minutes remaining in a game, with the TWolves down 15+ points.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in skipping practice because he’s already too good and doesn’t need it.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in looking completely disinterested while at the arena/on the bench/in a game. (This one was slightly subjective.)
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in making single women hate him.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in making everyone hate him.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in dating the ugliest Kardashian sister.
- Unofficial TWolves career leader in cheating on the ugliest Kardashian sister with the assistance of FaceBook.
- Rashanda McCants who plays for the Minnesota Lynx.
- Traded to the Sacramento Kings for Shelden Williams, who is married to WNBA player Candace Parker, who is a better basketball player than Rashad McCants.

 

“I don’t even know how to explain how bad it was having him on our team. He didn’t contribute anything and when it was supposed to be his and jefferson’s team he still couldn’t put up numbers.” – Minnesota Polars

“Shaddy, Shaddy, Shaddy.  He is an enigma wrapped in a mystery wrapped in a riddle wrapped in disturbia.  He also is the Wolves’ career leader in OPWHSSATBTWT (Offensive Plays Where He Stands Still At The Baseline The Whole Time).” – BonK

“With his tongue sticking out in every photo like he was possessed fronting like he was the bad boy of  B-ball, yet he was no Rodman (n that dude had game ), his huge ego and lack of skills made him hard to like for even the most die hard T-wolves fan.” – Mad_Dog04

“If he smiled more he’d have been a star.  Just ask him.” – Pants

“ONE OF TWO BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENTS OF ALL TIME.” – Poppa BonK

I was on the record saying I never wanted us to draft McCants.  Then we did and I was sad.  After drafting him, TWB members talked me into liking him.  Then he played his first game for us.  And that was all we needed to see.  The end. – CW

 

1) Michael Olowokandi: 2004 – 2006

(83 Total Voting Points)

kandi1kandi2kandi3kandi4

Timberwolves Accomplishments:

- Did get a sizeable three year free-agent contract from the Wolves in 2003.
- Almost scored 7 points per game for the Wolves.
- Almost grabbed 6 rebounds per game for the Wolves.
- Almost shot 45% from the field in more than one season for the Wolves.
- Almost shot more than 60% from the free throw line in more than one season for the Wolves.
- Almost averaged more combined assists and steals per game than turnovers for the Wolves.
- Was almost as good as Oleksiy Pecherov. (Former TWB Unsung Player of the Year whattup.)
- Was definitely one of the biggest #1 overall pick draft busts of all-time.
- Was nick-named “The Kandi Man”, which is somehow, mind-blowingly, one of the coolest player nick-names ever.
- Wasn’t actually drafted by the Wolves (cause for celebration.)

 

“He was on THAT team and he still couldn’t pull his head out.” – Pants

“Lets face it with injuries laziness n just plain horrid skills hes number one lets face it Oliver Miller was a better center for us that year we made it into the playoffs deep.” – Mad_Dog04

“The Man, the Myth, and the Bust.” – Thomas Little

“After losing Nesterovic to the Spurs, I thought the Kandi Man was a downgrade. He proved me right when he handled his knee injury badly and brought the hopes of Wolves fans with them, only to rely on the aging Ervin Johnson (and not the good one).” – Tom Mead

“Was supposed to be our center down low, proved that he was just one of the worst #1 draft picks ever. Shocking though considering the Kandi Man was a sweet nickname, but the Kandi was sour not sweet.” – Minnesota Polars

All I can say is THANK GOD it wasn’t the T-Wolves that actually drafted one of the worst #1 overall draft picks ever.  We just signed him as a free agent.  Still… thank god. – CW


*********************************************************************************************************************

 

Also Receiving Votes: Donyell Marshall (19 total voting points), Luc Longley (17), Loren Woods (15), Christian Laettner (13), Stephon Marbury, Mike James (12), Isaiah Rider (8), Stacey King, Joe Smith (7), Gerald Green, Bob McCann, Cherokee Parks, Mike Miller (6), Stanley Robinson, Tellis Frank (5), Marcus Banks, Stanley Roberts (4), Mike Miller, Marion Maxey, Randy Wittman (3), Ryan Hollins, Erving Johnson, Latrell Sprewell, Brian Cardinal, Ryan Gomes (1).

 

Stephon Marbury – He played well, but was a little bitch” – jtshoopsblog

Stephon Marbury – Why couldn’t you have stayed with KG?” – Minnesota Polars

Donyell Marshall – You know you are a bust when you get traded 40 games into your rookie season as a #4 overall pick.  And yes, he was drafted directly after Jason Kidd & Grant Hill.  Stats-wise, he has the least amount of win shares (he is actually in the negative) in Wolves history for a guy who played over 1,000 minutes that is not named Will Avery.” – BonK

Mike Miller – I don’t think any veteran has ever done less with more talent on such a hapless basketball team.  His refusal to shoot when open on such an offensively challenged team caused even the most patient of fans to lose their temper.  He also was the NBA league leader with 1.2 FDCIPOTGUAMLBJF per game (Fell Down Cringing In Pain Only To Get Up A Minute Later & Be Just Fine).” – BonK

Mike Miller – Picked him up to play for his somewhat hometown team. Was told he was a good knock down shooter from the perimeter but only shot like 2 times a game the rest were passes. I guess if you make 1 out of 2 that qualifies as good. Except when he shot like 10 or more and only made 1.” – Minnesota Polars

Loren Woods – Lots of talent, but no brain, heart, or courage.  He should have followed the yellow brick road.” – BonK

Loren Woods – I am still bitter that he didn’t turn into a sleeper plus he couldn’t make a shot to save his life.)” – Thomas Little

Isiah Rider/Christian Laettner – College studs who were NBA duds (and headcases).  The Wolves lottery luck/draft picks in the 90′s were just unreal.  My favorite Wolves locker room story ever not involving KG was when, after an embarassing loss, Laettner walked around the locker room getting in 4 or 5 different individual’s faces, pointing at them,  and declaring “Loser” each time.  Then he pointed at himself, said “Winner” and walked out.” – BonK

Christian Laettner – This should have been the turning point of the franchise.” – Pants

Isaiah Rider – Yes he was great on the court his first couple years here but that does even compare to how bad he was off the court. This is the guy no one wants on their team because they are a cancer. Always late to practice, run in with the law, and his attitude is all wrong.” – Minnesota Polars

Mike James – Totally ineffective.  Came here after a 20.3 ppg season and only scored 10.1 ppg, on 42% shooting.  I remember before that season some people were declaring he & Ricky Davis as effective replacements to Cassell & Spree and coining them the “new Big 3″.  Yucky.” – BonK

Mike James - Useless.” – Pants

Joe Smith – He is hear because of THE CONTRACT not poor play.  Even if you elminate the fact that the deal was illegal it was idiotic top level role player like Joe.” – Pants

Joe Smith – Not a terrible player, but bring up his name and only heart break will follow in Wolves land. Losing so many draft picks really hurts, not that we are especially good at it, but the practice would have been good.” – Tom Mead

Ryan Hollins – Wow he had some nice dunks, but that doesn’t make up for the fact that when you’re watching him you expect him to go mad and beat down some guy.” – Minnesota Polars

Latrell Sprewell – Maybe a suprise, but after the awesome ’04 season was a major distraction and an awful player. Also the feeding his family bit was a slap in the face to all his fans and to anyone who will never see that kind of money. His hair-do was hilarious though.” – Tom Mead

 

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