VS. 
There’s no need to belabor this post with a detailed re-cap of the Mascot Challenge Final Four. After some extremely close battles across the board in the Elite 8, Mr. T and Macgyver absolutely leveled their most recent competition. Mr. T took out the Macho Man with 78% of the vote and Macgyver went all Old Yeller on the tournament’s underdog, knocking out Fat Spiderman with 60%.
We’ve spent nearly three weeks obsessing over the virtues of these two opponents. One’s a Grade A mamma jamma who lays a beat down on any jibba-jabba talk’n fool in his way. The other is an other-wordly genius with a sweet, sweet mullet, who invented the phrase “Impossible is Nothing”. Both are supremely worth candidates to lead the Timberwolves into Tuesday’s draft lottery. But there can only be one…
So what will it be Wolves fans? Brains or Brawn? Do we overcome our 21 years of bad luck with a haymaker to the jaw and a boot to the crotch, or do we narrowly escape from its grasp using packet of ketchup and a bendy-straw? One choice will lead us to John Wall or Evan Turner, the other to Derrick Coleman, er, DeMarcus Cousins. The stakes for the Timberwolves have truly never been higher!
And now, the time has come to name our mascot. So take a moment to reflect, weigh the options, and cast your final vote. Just make sure that it’s the right one, because if it’s not, this is pretty much what will happen to our franchise…
And on that note, here’s your ballot!